A long time coming... Round 2

         With the summer nearly come and gone, I have officially failed as a blogger. Sometimes I feel really inclined to write about how I'm feeling and what's going on in my life but this summer hasn't brought anything worth writing about. It seems as though everything over the past few years leading up to this summer has been experience over comfort and yet this summer has become, a motto of the rock isn't going any where. Vacations, climbing trips, adventurous weekends have all been planned but haven't seem to happen. 

The road to the six shooters in Indian creek ut, another rock that's isn't going any where 

       I'm so dedicated to a job that I hate but can't seem to let it go. I make alright money, get benefits and everyday I get to talk about how much I love this desert tourist town. Doesn't sound so bad, right? Yeah, I like telling people about all the great things in Moab, but I'd rather show them. I'm an adventurer, an explorer, being at this desk, in this office drives me insane. I live in a place were adventure truly is endless, and what am I doing? Planning other peoples adventures. I need to give up this security blanket and be on my own adventures.

generic crack, Indian creek ut, my life represented as a climb, one long deep struggle. 

          I think a lot about the future, and all of the things I plan of doing with my life. Different jobs, different places, being successful, all of the things an adult should be thinking about it, and yet none of it seems to be happening. My life is on a timeline right now, but all the new things that are approaching aren't getting any closer. Two major vacations and a job change all only a few months away. But man oh man these months are dragging along.

Maybe this winter will be the time I make a name for myself. Being in the tourist industry is a great place to be but it's not where I want to be. I want to dive head first into the art world, and the climbing world. I want to be apart of those industries, and I finally have my foot in the door.

A small portion of what my foot in the door looks like. Outdoor retailer show in Salt Lake City  

Dream chaser

Lately I've been talking a lot about my plans for the summer and my big dreams as an artist, traveler, and adventurer, while it is important to have goals and dreams but it's also important to enjoy the path that those dreams are taking you down. I often get so caught up in making plans and making things happen in the future that I forget to enjoy the now and make things happen right now. ​

With my lack of success that I've found in Denver, I've become even more anxious to make big plans for the summer. But moving here wasn't a complete bust, I've seen some places and things that I would have never seen this winter if it weren't for living here. And I discovered somethings about my self and realized that some of the things I thought I wanted, I actually don't want at all. 

I thought I wanted the big city life with a huge art community and tons of things to do every weekend but it turns out, I'm not city girl, nor am I a social butterfly. I repeatedly escape to the near by mountains and foothills for some solidarity. Places like Rocky Mountain National Park, the flat irons of boulder, and the Garden of the Gods have become the reasons why I love Colorado.  

So while I'm busy chasing my art dreams, it's a slow chase full of mountains, desert, friendship, and enjoying every step of this crazy adventure we call life.  

Constant

Goals and aspirations are what's keeping me going at this moment in my life. Two and a half short months ago I made a choice to leave my heartland in search for something more. Hoping to find art, community, and a warm welcome in the big city of Denver Colorado. Unfortunately I've now spent those two and a half months serving bagels and making coffee for the community that didn't seem to have a warm welcome for me or my art. Lately I've been thinking "well maybe I didn't try hard enough or didn't talk to the right people" but the truth I didn't find what I was looking for because on the inside I didn't want to. Moab is where I need to be and Utah is the art community I want to be involved in. Along with work, I spend my remaining weeks in Denver making art, reading travel books and making the best of this place. Exploring and enjoying the near by mountains. Maybe one day I'll show my art in a gallery in this great city but now is not the time. 

Snowy forest of Rocky Mountain National Park. 

To keep myself going I make small day to day goals, goals I want to finish before I move, goals for 2015 and goals for a life time. Goal number one, keep doing what makes me happy even if I'm not in the right place 'make art'. Other goals like save money, get into better shape, read more books, take more photos, talk to more people. Make 2015 a traveling year. These are all the things keeping me motivated and happy. Even though I don't like it here I'm still happy because that just means I have something to lookforward to and I tried something new. I've learned I'm not cut out for the big city but maybe one day my art will be. The only way to find out is to keep making art. 

Capitol Hill